Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Learning to let go. . . .

I am not a good sick person.  There I have said it.  I have said this to my husband for the past 4 weeks as well.

I get emotional and weepy when I'm sick.  It's pretty pitiful.



Many of you know we are expecting our third little bundle of joy.  Soon after hearing this GREAT news, the all day nausea and extreme (I feel like I have been tranquillised) exhaustion came on, stealing of bit of the joy I was feeling.  Don't get me wrong, I couldn't be more excited we are having another little one, but at the moment it's all I can do to get through each day.


With my other two pregnancies it was smooth sailing, a small bit of nausea in the morning, maybe a bit more tired that usual, but nothing like this.  It came on early and strong.

These last few weeks have been a humbling experience for me.  I am not a person who asks for help easily, I am a goer, a doer, active and involved.

At not even 5 weeks I was overcome with all day nausea, the kind where you know you need to eat but nothing at all sounds even the bit appetising.   Saltine crackers and rice cakes became my best friends.  This might have been manageable on it's own, but that combined with the extreme exhaustion was too much.

I was feeling so sick and so tired that even walking from the bed to the couch left me feeling terrible.

Luckily I had a wonderful sister and friends who stepped up to help.  They arranged several meals a week for us, have offered to help with the little people, and who have offered words of prayers and encouragement.  It has been so wonderful having meals during the week and not having to worry about finding the energy to get up and make them.

I sought some advice from a friend who I knew had been very sick during her pregnancy and she offered such words of encouragement.

1. This is only for a season.  I think so many time in life when we are struggling with whatever it may be, spiritual needs, physical ailments, etc that we try to maintain a certain standard for ourselves and when we can't do it all when get upset.  It's time to remember that it's only for a season.  We may have to lower our expectations of ourselves, let things go that we normally wouldn't.  Let the kids watch a movie when normally we wouldn't have the tv on, let others serve and support us.  Sometimes we have to kick it into survival mode and live through the season.

2.  Let go of the guilt.  This was a big one for me!!  Guilt in having others have to do things for me, guilt in not being as active and involved a parent as I normally am, guilt at having Ed having to pick up all the slack.  I have to let go of that.  I need to remember that this is where I am right now and it's but for a season, that this gives others a chance to love and serve, and that the little people are more resilient than I give them credit for.


There is beginning to be a light at the end of this dark tunnel.  I am feeling a bit better most days now and able to get up and do a bit more.  I couldn't have done it without all the meals and help and especially without Ed.

He has been so patient and amazing.  He's been understanding when I break down into tears 3 or 4 times a day.  Encouraged me to rest as much as possible, taken over breakfast duty which is typically when I'm feeling the worst.  He's taken over more of the household duties as well as doing all his work as well.  I couldn't ask for a better partner and encourager through all of this.


Asking for help doesn't come easily for me, which is why it was so wonderful when I was surprised by my sister organizing meals for us.  I can't even begin to express the gratitude I've felt for all of them either, it has made such a huge difference for us.  It makes me realise all the more how these small things can mean so much to someone.

So I encourage you,  look for someone around you who could use a little help and give it, it probably won't take a whole lot of energy for you but will make a huge difference for them.



Friday, February 22, 2013

Milestones


Today we celebrated another milestone as a family.  Eddie and I celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary.


It wasn't our most exciting anniversary ever, because of the little bean, I have been sick and totally exhausted all day every day, and he came down with a cold yesterday.


Despite those things we still had a nice evening out.  Thanks to our wonderful friends and neighbors who volunteered to keep our little people we had some time to ourselves.  We went to our favourite Thai place for some take a way and just caught the sunset over the ocean.  We had a nice, peaceful dinner watching the waves crash in and feeling the nice ocean breeze.  Then we headed off to San Churros for a wonderfully delicious chocolate milkshake even though I could only take a few sips.


I am constantly reminded at how blessed I am.  I am married to an amazing, supportive, encouraging man, who seeks to love me as God intended. 



 It has been an amazing nine years, filled with:  travel, a move across the world, two beautiful children and one on the way, lots of ups and downs and exciting times.  



It makes it all go so much smoother when you are married to your best friend.  


I remember in one of our first serious conversations that we had we both stated how we wanted to dedicate our lives to serving the Lord, little did we know then that we would be doing this but as a team together.  




I don't think either of us would have anticipated the changes and adventures that we have undergone together these last nine years, but it has all been worth the craziness.  



I love him more and more each year and thank God every day for the blessing he is in my life.  I am definitely blessed beyond measure.  



Last night as we were heading home early, I told Ed that one of the ways that I feel so blessed, is that not only do I love spending alone time with him, but I love being together as a family.  Not only has Ed given me 9 wonderful years but also two pretty amazing little people as well and he is one pretty great DAD!!

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Family Poem

As this year begins we have a new little family poem to share:


One, Two, I love you
My Best Friend!!!  I can't imagine my life without him

Three, Four two kids that I adore

These two have made my life so wonderful.  They made me laugh every day!! It has been the ultimate blessing watching them grow and develop.


Five, Six  our new babies pics  




That's right our little family is growing once again.  We are so excited and it was such a wonderful relief to get to go and see that little heart beat and know that so far everything was going well.  

We are still early days, only 7 1/2 weeks but since I have been much sicker this round we have told everyone early.  It's hard to hide when you look like death most days :)  

 Matilda is so excited to have a new little one on the way (though as soon as we told her about the baby she informed us that this time she would like a little sister).  She went with us to the ultrasound and now refers to the new little bub and the beanie baby because it's small and round.  We have also started reading her the weekly what you baby looks like now so she can feel more involved with is all.  Nathan is pretty oblivious to it all though for the past several nights he has been praying for "mommy's tummy"  which I think is absolutely adorable.  

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Happy Birthday little man!!!


Today, 3rd February, our little man turned 2.  He joined our little family at 4:18 am weighing 8lb 8oz, after a smooth and easy labour (except for the fact that my waters broke at our Wednesday night bible study)--a bit embarrassing.  His debut into the world should have been a sign to us of his nature, because he has been easy going ever since.  

My how these two years have flown by.  He has blessed our home and our lives in so many ways.  

He is full of so much energy and enthusiasm.  


He is so sweet and courteous.  He is always so quick with please, thank-yous, and bless you's, which I would credit to great parenting, but we still have to work with his older sister on those.  


He has such an adorable laugh and can be so silly.  He's rough and tough and often a mess.


He absolutely adores his sisters!! He worries if she is upset, always wants to know where she is,  and wants her for his constant companion. 



I can't imagine our lives without this adorable little man around.  I had always said before we found out that we were having a little boy that it didn't matter what we had, but I am so glad that God blessed us with this little man!!!  He makes me smile from the moment he wakes up asking "Mom, you have good sleep?"   until his "I love you so much" each night. He has been a blessing since day one!!



Happy Birthday my sweet little man.  God has blessed me beyond measure by giving me you.  I look forward to all the adventures, laughs, and birthday to come!!!